I don't know if I'm allergic to something in my aunt's house, but I keep waking up all stuffy/sore throat. This morning was the worst... I can feel it subsiding already, so I don't think I'm actually sick or anything. The dogs are kinda smelly. I feel like I should give them a big bath. My aunt is also trying to find a home for Lincoln... Who is basically a white/black version of Chauncey, but not as retarded. Does anyone want him? I get a bonus for dogsitting if I find him a home, haha.

Today is glorious St. Paddy's Day. I would really like to get some corned beef, potatoes, and beer today. But I don't know where, and I don't know with who.

Lindsey is supposed to be coming here tomorrow, with possibly Kelly, neither of which I've seen since late summer/early fall. So, that should be interesting.

I wanted to go wander around and find places to take pictures today, but the sun isnt out, and it's a bit chilly for my liking. I guess I'll just have to wait it out until another day this week.


-j.

street lights, people.

I'm totally digging this playlist I made. 

It reminds me of my childhood and the present, so that's pretty good I guess. 

I forgot to talk about the other night... My mom and I decided to order a pizza, but we wanted to try somewhere new around here that we haven't had before - and that's always scary as it is.

So we pick a place right down the street, and I call to place an order for pickup... the girl goes through all the normal questions... 

"Have you ever ordered with us before?"

"No, I haven't"

"And, your last name?"

"North"

"Can you spell that for me?"

"Uhhhh.... N-O-R-T-H?"

"Can I have your phone number, please."

"867-5309" (hah, i don't know who reads this)

"And what's your address"

" ------ "

At this point, I'm like, wow, this is a lot of questions for picking a damn pizza up. Then, she totally catches me off guard with this next one.

"Do you live in a subdivision?"

"Uh, yeah, I guess it's considered that." (Seriously though, if you live in Orland how do you NOT live in a subdivision?

"And which one do you live in?"

At this point, I go completely blank. I honestly could not remember, so after about 30 seconds of me ruffling through papers in the kitchen looking for any indicator, I reply with the logical

"Yeah, uh, I'm picking my pizza up, so does this even really matter in the first place?"

"Oh, no, I guess it doesn't..."

I just found it odd. I've ordered pizzas from a LOT of places, and I've never gotten grilled like, even when it was delivery... in Chicago.

But other than that, what I have been up to?

Last night I went to SuperK and the SuperWalmart with my cousin Maggie to look for bags for her to send to her ex in Iraq so they have something to do with their downtime. Of course, they did not have them at either place. But, we did find a sweet 10-person tent that we're going to get, and organize a camping trip(s) this summer. I'm stoked. I haven't been camping in so long. 

We also concluded that we should go to the flea market for beanbags, but neither of us are morning people, especially on the weekend, so we have made a plan to pull an all-nighter drinking, then going to the flea market. I agreed just so I could go and photograph all the creepers wandering around. 

My plans for the night are shot to hell, which I'm disappointed about. First, the 'Grandmaster Plan of Doom' was supposed to take place, but i think everyone forgot/doesn't care. So scratch that. But, since today is "Pi(e) Day", Lauren is having people over at her place for pie and jello shots. I hate jello. But she is making real fancy jello shots, and if they have booze in them, I'm all about it. And I have to miss out, because I have to go out to my Aunt's in Morris tonight instead of tomorrow... And obviously I'm not even there yet. Lame.

Lame.

Lame.

I'm not happy about it, at all.

Okay, I feel like this has been long enough.

-j.

Blog: It's like a sound you would make when vomiting... or constipated. - Jess' Definition

So, I had an interesting experience last night. I found all of my extremely old LiveJournals, like way back in the day. I believe they date back to the summer after 8th grade and go through til almost the end of sophmore year.

Let me just say, WOW. If I could go back in time and slap myself in the back of the head, I would. I was such a baby. Apparently I was extremely angsty, and to some extent depressed, because some of the things I wrote are just astounding. So, if we were friends then, I apologize and thank you for putting up with my ridiculous bullshit. If we were not friends, consider yourself lucky. 

My 3 significant high school relationships are documented in there as well... which makes sense because they were all in row. It's funny to go back and read now, because I've made peace will all three of those ex's, but geeze. 

One in particular, I went from being friends with him, to dating him over someone else, to having a "great relationship" to going on a break, to him then dumping me, me then saying the relationship "was never that great" to us being friends, to the two of us hating each other... Throughout the remainder of high school, we didn't talk, and the only reason I think we are in contact now is because I saw him at Lollapalooza of all places to run into someone you never talk to, and from there I believe we become friends via myspace or facebook.

It's just amazing to see how much people grow up in the course of 6-8 years.

I will say though, there were a lot of people in my life then that I wish were still a part of my life. They are to some extent, again thanks to networking sites, but these are people that WERE my life back then (I'm talking about my "Oak Lawn" friends).

I'm pretty sure none of them read this, or will read this but I suppose I'm going to get all sappy and nostalgic about it anyway. 

Tom Molloy - Definitely one of my best friends. We understood each other, and for someone to understand me back then, is saying something. 

Mike Norris - He was the one who kept my ass in line. I'm pretty sure he, as well as everyone else, considered him "the father of the group", and I agree with this 100%. 

Mark Ruthenburg - We had our share of ups and downs through the years, but we've always seemed to overcome them. Currently, he's the one I probably still talk to the most at this point.

James Doyle - Was the epitome of the phrase "best friend". I don't think I could have loved that boy more even if I tried. I'm pretty sure we've had our fights, but I'm not exactly sure how we've grown so far apart to the point of me not even knowing how to contact him. I think majority of our other friends at the time don't talk to him anymore either, but losing that relationship is probably the one that hits me the hardest. 

oh&

Billy Molloy - You don't get too much of a shout out considering we have a way of drunkenly IMing each other within the past year, and I know that you read this (or have at least read it once). I mean, come on, I have your blog linked on my page. But, reading through things, I did find Tom reference us as "love birds" at one point. It made me laugh for a second.

As far as girls go, I have nothing to say. I have two great female friends from Oak Lawn, and honestly, those are the two that I will ever need - no one can even compare. I'm sure you can take a wild guess as to who they are. If you know me at all, you know.

That's it for the moment.

making a photoblog isnt as easy as it seems.

I attempted to make one on this site, but apparently the layout doesn't resize to photographs.

And well, that's just irritating. 

And, I give up for the time being.

I'm waiting for Nicki to get here. 

And that's about it.

I just realized how narcissistic it is to have yourself as your background. I'm not even sure how it happened, especially because this is an older photo. Maybe I should change that...

Breathe in good, breathe out bad, remind yourself of the things you have, it's easy.

Alright, so, it's 5:30am.

I just read for about 2 hours and finished a book that has taken me forever to get through. And of course, now I'm feeling all "ponderous" about life. This book was the fourth in a series (appropriately titled "Fourth Comings") that I have been keeping up with for probably about 5 years, or however long it's been since the first has come out. 

I don't want to write a book report about it, because if you really want to read it, you'll start from the beginning and figure it all out on you own, but just for a quick description, the books are based on a character named Jessica, and are her journals throughout highschool/college/post graduation. In this past book, she's 22, so since I was 15 or 16, these books have been "coming of age" tales growing up at the same time as I. 

So, of course thoughts are just swirling. Am I okay with where I'm at in my life right now? No. Can I change that? Of course. But do I even have the motivation at this point? I don't know.

I took a break in the middle of reading because it referenced craigslist. So of course, I started checking prices for apartments... but not for here. Not for anywhere remotely close. I'm pretty sure I don't ever want to move to Chicago again. It no longer does anything for me. It's a beautiful city, and of course I will always love it, but I no longer yearn for it. If I'm going to live in the area, I'm going to live in the suburbs, hands down. But lately, I just want to move, far, far away, preferably across a sea so I can't come crawling home whenever there's trouble. I just feel as if I've fucked my life up so bad from my expectations of what it should be that I just want to start over, somewhere new. 

And the thing is, the only thing technically keeping me here, aside from the fact that I am poor and don't have a car, are my friends. And not even all of them. Just a handful. 

I used to think that I wouldn't be able to function without a certain person in my life, and to some extent, that is true. I've become emotionally crippled, but it's not because he's not in my life, it's because he ever was a part of it the first place.

I don't know how he ever truly felt, and I probably never will because I'm pretty sure 80% of whatever came out of his mouth was pure bullshit. The other 20% was made up of quotes of somebody else, because he's so insecure with himself, the only thing he apparently feels he can rely on is his dick. 

And as far as I know, most of the people he's ever involved himself with, whether it be romantically, platonic (which i don't know if there's even a female in that category) have ever said "fuck you" and left it at that. I know I've told him "fuck you" countless times before, and somehow, he still slithered his way back into my life. 

And this scares me to death.

For years, my family, my friends asked me what the fuck was I thinking, what the fuck was I doing, he was a piece of shit, I deserved better, and even though I thought the same things in the back of my head, I repressed my thoughts and convinced myself otherwise. I was caught in a fantasy that life could be like a book. Or a movie. That I could marry the boy who was my first kiss. That I could marry the boy that I was infatuated with since the first moment I laid eyes on him. That he would eventually want to be with me just as badly as I wanted to be with him. That something was bringing us back together for a reason. That we were meant to be. 

But, the person I was in love with, that I tried so hard to make love me back, was the fantasy. The person I wanted him to be, that he ultimately pretended to be, was completely... artificial. Everything out of his mouth was a script, not made for me, but for whoever it applied to at the time. 

I have tried so hard to live without regrets, and I've accomplished it for the most part. There's three things that I've ever regretted. 

1. Never finding the time over the course of a year to go see my Grandfather before he died. 

2. Never fully apologizing to Charlie for.... whatever, on his deathbed. 

3. Daniel Wagner.

And never in a million years would I have imagined it would have even went as far as it did, or that because it did, that I could ever regret it all as much as I do now. 

"You just don't understand, you don't know the other side of it, you don't see him like I do."

Mark those fucking words. Because for 5 years, it was part of my vocabulary. 

And to this day, I don't know how to say "goodbye". I don't know if I ever will. 

So much of my life is built up memories of him or things interconnected to/with him, that at times, I don't even know how to handle it. So much of myself is built up on memories of him. Except now the happiness that once was associated with him, is now disgust, nausea, and anger. 

And now I'm stuck again. 

It may be a coincidence, but Elliott Smith's - "Somebody That I Used to Know" is playing, so for now I'll leave you with his words since I can't find my own.

I had tender feelings that you made hard

But it's your heart, not mine, that's scarred
So when I go home, I'll be happy to go
You're just somebody that I used to know

You don't need my help anymore
It's all now to you, there ain't no before
Now that you're big enough to run your own show
You're just somebody that I used to know

I watched you deal in a dying day
And throw a living past away
So you can be sure that you're in control
You're just somebody that I used to know

I know you don't think you did me wrong
And I can't stay this mad for long
Keeping a hold of what you just let go
You're just somebody that I used to know...

-j

What did I tell you. I again apologize now for the length.

I am also including this link so you can reference the first version... because it's pretty embarrassing.

001. FIRST NAME: Jennifer
002. MIDDLE NAME: Elizabeth
003. LAST NAME: North
004. NICKNAME(S): Jenn, JennNorth, JNO, 
005. GENDER: Vagina.
006. AGE: 21
007. BIRTHDAY: 11.24.86
008. HEIGHT: 5'5" 
009. HAIR COLOR: currently brown.
010. EYE COLOR: blue/grey/green.
011. RACE: White.
012. DO YOU WEAR GLASSES/CONTACTS: Nope. I tend to lose my glasses.
013. PALE OR TAN: real pale.
014. IS YOUR HAIR LONG OR SHORT: It's longer... I'd say medium.
015. WHERE WERE YOU BORN: Illinois
016. CURRENT LOCATION: Orland Park
017. ZODIAC SIGN: Sagittarius 
018. HOW MANY LANGUAGES DO YOU KNOW: Technically, 2. English & French.
019. NATIONALITY: We'll just go with Irish. 
020. BAD HABITS: Sleeping during the day. Smoking. Drinking. Swearing. Procrastination. 
021. PIERCINGS YOU HAVE: My lobes are the only thing still open I think. 
022. PIERCINGS YOU WANT: I want my septum back. I still want an industrial, too.
023. TATTOOS YOU HAVE: Broken heart on left wrist, stars on collarbones, colt .45's on hips.
024. TATTOOS YOU WANT: Blues Brothers half sleeve on upper right arm, pirate ship on left side of my body.
025. TODAYS DATE: Today is March the 8th, 2008.
026. THE TIME: 5:20pm
027. READY FOR A BUNCH MORE QUESTIONS: Yeah, there are most certainly a bunch.

. . family
028. MOTHERS NAME: Kim
029. FATHERS NAME: Tony
030. STEP-PARENTS NAME, IF ANY: Charlie (deceased)
031. BROTHER(S)S NAME(S): Tony
032. SISTER(S)S NAME(S): Sister in Law - Candace.
033. FAVORITE AUNT: Kerrie
034. FAVORITE UNCLE: Todd/Charlie
035. FAVORITE GRANDPARENT: The dead one.
036. WORST RELATIVE: Uh, my cousin Megan?
038. DO YOU GET ALONG WITH YOUR PARENTS: Generally. My dad, always. My mom - sometimes.
039. DOES ANYONE IN YOUR FAMILY UNDERSTAND YOU: I'm not a troubled teen anymore. I don't need to be "understood".

school...
043. ARE YOU STILL IN SCHOOL: No.
044. DID YOU DROP OUT: I flunked a semester, and I can't afford to go back right now. Does that count?
045. CURRENT GPA, OR LAST GPA YOU GOT: I have no idea what my last GPA was. It was really good the previous semester. I think it was a 3.3 or something.
046. FAVORITE GRADE: Sophmore year was just an epic year.
047. LEAST FAVORITE GRADE: Probably 6th grade. I cried a lot. 
048. FAVORITE TEACHER: Bill Kirby - Darkroom I & II
049. LEAST FAVORITE TEACHER: Sara Klien - Art History 
050. FAVORITE SUBJECT: Photography, obviously.
051. LEAST FAVORITE SUBJECT: Art History. I'm too bored during it in a dark room.
052. DO/DID YOU BUY LUNCH OR BRING IT: I don't go to "lunch"
053. PLAY ANY SPORTS ON THE SCHOOLS TEAM: No.
054. DO/DID YOU DO ANY EXTRACURRICULAR ACTIVITIES: Ha.
055. ARE/WERE YOU POPULAR: Cliche definition of popular? No. Did I have a lot of friends? Yes.
056. FAVORITE DANCE: None.

057. FAVORITE MEMORY: Who can pick a favorite memory?
058. LEAST FAVORITE DANCE: Probably Homecoming Freshman year. It was so awkward. 
059. LEAST FAVORITE MEMORY: Daniel Wagner. In general. 

. . favorites
061. NUMBER: 7.
062. CLOTHING BRAND: Sadly enough, the Gap.
063. SHOES: Kenzie.
064. SAYING: Fucktard, for sure. 
065. TV SHOW: All time? TheOC. More recently, Arrested Development/Weeds/Nip/Tuck/Always Sunny 
066. SPORT: Baseball.
067. VEGETABLE: I dig asparagus a lot.
068. FRUIT: Bananas.
069. MOVIE: Batman (Returns) (Begins), Rocky Horror, Good Fellas, The Departed, Wes Anderson films, ect ect.
070. MAGAZINE: I don't read magazines. I enjoyed reading Cosmo while doing overnights because it was highly inappropriate for work at 4am.
071. ACTOR: Jason Lee, Jason Bateman, Will Arnett, Rainn Wilson
072. ACTRESS: I don't like actresses enough to have favorites. 
073. CANDY: M&M varieties. 
074. GUM: Winterfresh flavored kinds.
075. CANDY BAR: Strawberry Charleston Chew. Even though I probably haven't found one in like 8 years. 
076. SCENT: Fresh & Clean scents. 
077. ICE CREAM FLAVOR: Moose Tracks.
078. COLOR: Brown.
079. SEASON: Fall. 
080. HOLIDAY: Halloween. 
081. BAND: Too many. 
082. SINGER: Again.
083. GROUP: Guh.
084. RAPPER: N/A.
085. TYPE OF MUSIC: Classic Rock/Indie/Electronica/Rock
086. YOUR ROOM: This doesn't fit into the "favorites" category. If we're asking what my favorite thing IN my room is, I'll go with my computer/camera.
087. PLACE TO BE: On vacation.
088. FOOD: Pizza.
089. TV CHANNEL: Nope.
090. JUNK FOOD: French fries, for sure. 
091. OVERALL FOOD: Pizza?
092. STORE: Sigh.
093. SHOE BRAND: Kenzie.
094. FAST FOOD: BK.
095. RESTAURANT: Expensive ones.
096. SHAPE: Star.
097. TIME OF DAY: After the sun goes down.
098. COUNTRY: I've never been to another country aside from here, so I don't know yet. 
099. STATE: Oregon.
100. BOY`S NAME: Sebastian, Willam, Cornelius. 

101. GIRL`S NAME: James.
102. MALL: I hate going to malls.
103. VIDEO GAME: Guitar Hero/Rock Band
104. SHAMPOO: Expensive ones.
105. BOARD GAME: Mall Madness. 
106. COMPUTER GAME: I play Monopoly on my computer.
107. POKEMON: Seriously?
108. MUSIC VIDEO: Radiohead - Karma Police
109. SWEAR WORD: Fuck.
110. WORD: Anything that is considered foul.
111. MONTH: October.
112. CARTOON CHARACTER: Bob Oblong.
113. SCARY MOVIE: House of 1000 Corpses/The Devil's Rejects.
114. TEAM: The White Sox.
115. POSSESSION: My camera.

. . whats the first thing u think of when u hear. . 
116. EMINEM: No.
117. DOG: Sit.
118. HOT: Dog.
119. BRITNEY SPEARS: Hot Mess. 
120. NSYNC: Heck Yes.
121. REAL WORLD: Audition.
122. ORANGE: Juice.
123. CHOICE: Pro.
124. FUCK: Tard.
125. BISEXUAL: Fake.
126. BLACK: Eye.
127. ICQ: Messenger.
128. INSANE CLOWN POSSE: Gross.
129. LINKIN PARK: Hah.
130. JACK: Daniels.
131. RAINBOW: In the Dark.
132. CRACKER: Jack.
133. CUCUMBER: Dildo.
134. SHARK: Fruit snacks.
135. LIFEHOUSE: Shitty band.
136. BAT: MAN!
137. LEATHER: Couch.
138. WHIP: Cool.
139. AMERICA: Fuck yeah, Here to save, the mother fuckin day yeah.
140. WATER: Balloon.
141. VOLCANO: Ash.

. . this or that
142. ROCK OR RAP: Rock
143. ROCK OR POP: Rock
144. ROCK OR R&B: Rock
145. ROCK OR METAL: Rock
146. RAP OR POP: Pop
147. RAP OR R&B: Rap
148. RAP OR METAL: Metal
149. POP OR R&B: Pop
150. POP OR METAL: Metal
151. R&B OR METAL: Metal
152. LINKIN PARK OR LIMP BIZKIT: Is this 1999?
153. TOOL OR KORN: Tool
154. SELENA OR JENNIFER LOPEZ: Boo.
155. HOT OR COLD: Hot
156. WINTER OR SUMMER: Summer
157. SPRING OR FALL: Fall.
158. SHAKIRA OR BRITNEY: Come on.
159. ICP OR EMINEM: Seriously.
160. MARILYN MANSON OR ROB ZOMBIE: Rob Zombie
161. KITTIE OR GARBAGE: Garbage
162. MTV OR VH1: MTV
163. BUFFY OR ANGEL: Gross.
164. DAWSON`S CREEK OR GILMORE GIRLS: Don't like either.
165. FOOTBALL OR BASKETBALL: Football.
166. SUMMER OLYMPICS OR WINTER OLYMPICS: Summer.
167. SKIING OR SNOWBOARDING: Snowboarding.
168. ROLLERBLADING OR SKATEBOARDING: Skateboarding.
169. BLACK OR WHITE: Black.
170. ORANGE OR RED: Orange.
171. YELLOW OR GREEN: Green.
172. PURPLE OR PINK: Purple.
173. SLIPKNOT OR MUDVAYNE: ---
174. HOT TOPIC OR PAC SUN: ---
175. INSIDE OR OUTSIDE: Outside.
176. WEED OR ALCOHOL: Alcohol.
177. CELL PHONE OR PAGER: iPhone
178. PEN OR PENCIL: Pencil.
179. POWERPUFF GIRLS OR CHARLIE`S ANGELS: ---
180. SCOOBY DOO OR DINO: Scooby Doo.
181. DBZ OR POKEMON: ---
182. STAR WARS OR STAR TREK: Star Wars.
183. TATTOOS OR PIERCING: Tattoos.
184. PREP OR PUNK: --- 
185. SLUT OR WHORE: Whore.

. . private life
186. DO YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND OR GIRLFRIEND: No.
187. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH: Uh. I guess?
188. DO YOU LOVE ANYONE RIGHT NOW: I love my friends/family.
189. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN LOVE: I thought so. He turned out to be a piece of shit.
190. HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE YOU KISSED: Uh, probably somewhere up in the 30 or 40s.
191. WHO WAS YOUR FIRST KISS: Daniel.
192. HOW MANY HEARTS HAVE YOU BROKEN: I doubt any.
193. HOW MANY PEOPLE BROKE YOUR HEART: One. 
194. BEST QUOTE TO SUM UP LOVE: Always trust your instincts. 
195. SO WHAT IS YOUR BF/ GF CRUSH LIKE: Don't have one.
196. DO YOU HAVE A PICTURE OF HIM/HER: No.
197. PLEASE POST IT IF YOU DO: No.
198. DO YOU HAVE A PICTURE OF YOURSELF: Yes.
199: PLEASE POST IF YOU DO: If you're reading this, I'm sure you know what I look like.
200. DO YOU GO BY LOOKS OR PERSONALITY: Personality. 
201. EVER KISS A FRIEND: Yes.
202. ARE YOU STILL FRIENDS: Yes.
203. SO MOVING ALONG..DO YOU SMOKE: Yes.
204. DO YOU SMOKE WEED: Sometimes.
205. EVER TRIP ON ACID: No.
206. HOW ABOUT A LITTLE X: No.
207. CRACK, HEROIN, ANYTHING ELSE: Can't say that I have.
208. BEER GOOD OR BEER BAD: Beer is awesome.
209. ARE YOU THE SISSY WHO DRINKS WINE COOLERS: No.
210. DO YOU LIKE SMIRNOFF ICE: No. It makes my stomach hurt.
211. PREFER BEER OR LIQUOR: Depends on my mood.
212. WHAT KIND OF CIGARETTES DO YOU SMOKE: Camel Turkish Silvers, but they're going extinct, so back to Marlboro Lights I guess.
213. ARE YOU A VIRGIN: Nope. Definitely not.
214. IF NO, WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU GOT SOME: I don't wanna talk about it.

. . would you ever
215. BUNGEE JUMP: Sure.
216. SKY DIVE: Yes.
217. SWIM WITH DOLPHINS: Yes.
218. SCUBA DIVE: Yes.
219. GO ROCK CLIMBING: Maybe. 
220. EAT SHIT FOR: Probably millions of dollars.
221. TURN YOUR BACK ON YOUR FRIENDS FOR PERSONAL GAIN: No.
222. STEAL A FRIEND`S BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND: No.
223: CROSS-DRESS: I guess? All I'd have to do is put on a tshirt and boy jeans.
224. LIE TO THE POLICE: If I had to.
225. RUN FROM THE POLICE: If I had to.
226. LIE TO YOUR PARENTS: Who hasn't? I don't need to lie to my parents anymore.
227. WALK UP TO A STRANGER AND KISS THEM: Probably.
228. BE AN EXOTIC DANCER: If I had the body for it, sure.
229. WALK OUT OF A RESTAURANT WITHOUT PAYING: No.
230: STREAK: Probably not.

. . friends
231. BEST FRIEND(S): The girls.
232. KNOWN LONGEST: Kellee.
233. WISH YOU TALKED TO MORE: People I used to be close with that I've lost touch with.
234. WISH YOU SAW MORE: Same answer applies.
235. HOW MANY FRIENDS DO YOU THINK YOU HAVE: Quite a few.
236. WHO DRIVES YOU INSANE AFTER A WHILE: People.
237. WHO CAN YOU STAY AROUND FOREVER AND NEVER GET SICK OF: Jess. Sunny.
238. EVER LOSE A GOOD FRIEND BECAUSE YOU TOOK IT TO THE "NEXT LEVEL": I guess you could say that?
239. CRAZIEST: All of us get pretty crazy when we're together.
240. LOUDEST: Uh. Justin?
241. WEALTHIEST: Zak.
242. BEST HAIR: Melissa has great hair.
243. CAN ALWAYS MAKE YOU LAUGH: Everyone.
244. BEST EYES: Nicki.
245. BEST BODY: Laura.
246. MOST ATHLETIC: Uh. Chris Colby? I don't know.
247. SEX SYMBOL: Nick, hahah.
248. HOT TEMPERED: Me. Kaylee.

249. MOST IMPATIENT: I think I am.
250. SHORTEST: Sunny.
251. TALLEST: Brandon.
252. TALENTED: Zak & Ryan.
253. BEST SINGER: Uh. I don't know.
254. SKINNIEST: Steff.
255. NICEST: Laura, Sunny, Kellee, Jess.
256. BEST PERSONALITY: Jessica.

257. BIGGEST DRUG USER: Hm. 

. . have you ever
258. FLASHED SOMEONE: Yeah. Bouncers.
259. TOLD THE PERSON YOU LIKE HOW YOU FELT: Yes.
260. BEEN TO MICHIGAN: Yes.
261. GOTTEN REALLY REALLY WASTED: Countless times... 
262. GONE TO JAIL OR JUVI: No.
263. SKATEBOARDED: If you wanna call it that.
264. SKINNY DIPPED: Yes.
265. STOLEN ANYTHING: That would be a definite. 
266. YELLED AT SOMEONE: Oh yeah.
267. KICKED SOMEONE`S ASS: I punched someone in the face.
268. PEGGED SOMEONE IN THE HEAD WITH A SNOWBALL: I have bad aim. Probably not.
269. BROKE A BEER BOTTLE: Sure. I drop things.
270. GOTTEN INTO A BAR, UNDER-AGED: Yeah. I had a fake for a year and a half before my 21st.
271. KISSED SOMEONE OF THE SAME SEX: Yes.
272. AND LIKED IT: No comment.
273. GONE ON A ROAD TRIP: Yeah, we drove to Florida for spring break last year. 
274. GONE ON VACATION WITHOUT ADULT SUPERVISION: Yes. A few times.
275. BEEN TO A STRIP CLUB: Yes.
276. BEEN TO ANOTHER COUNTRY: No.
277. TALKED BACK TO AN ADULT: Sure.
278. GOT PULLED OVER: Yes.
279. GOT IN A CAR ACCIDENT: Yes.
280. BROKE A LAW: For sure.
281. GIVEN MONEY TO A HOMELESS PERSON: I don't think so. I hate the homeless.
282. TRIED TO KILL YOURSELF: No.
283. CRIED TO GET OUT OF TROUBLE: Of course.
284. KISSED A FRIEND`S BROTHER OR SISTER: Actually, I don't think so. Apparently my answer to this before was yes, but I don't recall kissing anyone's siblings.
285. KISSED A BROTHER OR SISTER`S FRIEND: No. My brother has threatened all of his friends.
286. DROPPED SOMETHING ON THE FLOOR THAT YOU WERE COOKING & ATE ANYWAYS: Yeah. Heat kills germs.

. . opinions
287. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT POP MUSIC: I don't think about it.
288. ABOUT BOY BANDS: I used to dig NSYNC.
289. ABOUT FLAG BURNING: Freedom.
290. OF THE WAR ON TERRORISTS: I don't agree.
291. ABOUT SUICIDE: I think it's a stupid way to solve your problems.
292. ABOUT PEOPLE WHO TRY TO FORCE THEIR OPINIONS ON YOU: Can eat shit.
293. ABOUT ABORTION: It's a person's choice.
294. ABOUT ROCK/METAL MUSIC: I like it.
295. WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU`LL BE IN 10 YEARS: I'll be 31. Hopefully married with at least one kid. And a degree in something or other.
296. WHO DO YOU THINK YOU`LL STILL BE FRIENDS WITH IN 5 YEARS: Probably most of the people I'm friends with currently.

. . what did you do
297. LAST BIRTHDAY: Went out for a family dinner & hit the bar afterwards with friends. Then I threw up a lot.
298. YESTERDAY: I... did a lot of nothing, went out to dinner with Tony, Candace & Maddux, then had to go out to Shorewood so I could babysit my cousins today.
299. LAST WEEKEND: Umm. Friday, nothing. Saturday, drove all over while my mom kept missing flights, then went to Lauren's. Then Sunday, took my mom to the airport in the morning, went to Jess' for Sunday Dinner, then over to Nicki's and did a puzzle.
300. LAST CHRISTMAS: Went to my aunt's.
301. LAST THANKSGIVING: Went to my aunt's.
303. LAST HALLOWEEN: Went to Dreams to laugh at all the white trash in costumes.
304. LAST EASTER: Went to my aunt's.
305. LAST VALENTINE`S DAY: Went to Dreams. With Jess, Mike, & Dan.

. . tha last
306. THING YOU ATE: PB&J sandwich.
307. THING YOU DRANK: Pepsi.
308. THING YOU WORE: I'm in pajama pants, and a LTHS softball tshirt.
309. PLACE YOU WENT: Drove home from Shorewood.
310. THING YOU GOT PIERCED/TATTOOED: My guns.
311. PERSON YOU SAW: My mom.
312. PERSON YOU KISSED: Uh.
313. PERSON YOU HAD SEX WITH: ...
314. PERSON YOU TALKED TO: Jessica.

315. SONG YOU HEARD: The last one I remember is "The breakup song" by Ben Folds.

. . now?
316. WHAT ARE YOU EATING: Nothing. My mom is making tacos.
317. WHAT ARE YOU DRINKING: Nothing.
318. WHAT ARE YOU WEARING: We went over this.
319. ANY SHOES ON: No.
320. HAIR: Dirty/Messy.
321. LISTENING TO: Myself typing.
322. TALKING TO ANYONE: Jessica.... 
323. ARE YOU PISSED I MADE THIS SO LONG: ---

..yes or no
324. ARE YOU A VEGETARIAN: No. I tried that. I love cheeseburgers too much.
325. DO YOU LIKE COWS: I like to eat them.
326. ARE YOU A BITCH: Yeah. 
327. ARE YOU ARTISTIC: I like to think so.
328. DO YOU WRITE POETRY: Nope.
329. ARE YOU A FAST RUNNER: Hah!
330. CAN YOU SKI: Never tried.
331. ARE YOU BRITISH: I'm English.
332. DO YOU WANT TO SPEAR BRITNEY: I think just about everyone does.
333. DO THE VOICES TALK TO YOU: Uhhhhh NO.
334. DID YOU EVER GIVE BARBIE A HAIRCUT: Yeah.
335. WOULD YOU EAT MAC&CHEESE WITH HOT DOGS: I would eat Mac&Cheese WITH hotdogs, but not WITH hotdogs IN my mac&cheese.
336. DO YOU THINK DISNEY CREATORS WERE ON ACID WHEN THEY MADE `ALICE IN WONDERLAND'? I would assume so.
337. ARE YOU STRAIGHT: Yep.
338. ARE YOU STUPID, INSANE, OR PHYSICALLY HANDICAPPED: No.
339. ARE YOU FAT: No.
340. ARE YOU SKINNY: No.
341. ARE YOU SHORT: Not super.
342. ARE YOU TALL: No.
343. DO YOU OWN A HOT PINK SHIRT: No.
344. HOW ABOUT ORANGE PANTS: Absolutely not.
345. CAN YOU SEE THE FLYING MONKEYS: ... NO.
346. ARE YOU EVIL: No.
347. DID YOU EVER KNOW SOMEONE WHO HAD A MULLET: Yes.
348. IS BRITNEY A WHORE: Why all the britney questions? This is from before her transformation, too.
349. ARE YOU A TEENAGE ZOMBIE: I wish.
350. AM I ANNOYING YOU: Kinda, now, yes.
351. DO YOU LIKE MARILYN MANSON: Yes.
352. ARE YOU SECRETLY FROM ANOTHER PLANET: Nope.
353. DID YOU EVER TOUCH SOMEONE ELSE`S PRIVATE PARTS: Sure have.
354. DO YOU SHOP AT HOT TOPIC: Nope.

. . random questions
355. IF YOU COULD BE ANY ANIMAL, WHAT WOULD YOU BE: Mmm, maybe a shark.
356. IF YOU HAD TO EAT ONE THING FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, WHAT WOULD YOU EAT: Pizza or Cheeseburgers.
357. DO YOU REMEMBER ANY OF YOUR DREAMS: yes. a lot actually.
358. DO YOU DREAM IN COLOR OR BLACK AND WHITE: both. 
359. DO YOU ADMIT IT WHEN YOU NEED TO HELP WITH A PROBLEM: not always.
360. CAN PEOPLE READ YOU LIKE A BOOK: A select few.
361. WHAT`S YOUR BIGGEST FEAR: Being unsuccessful. 
362. DO YOU TALK A LOT: Yeah. Especially when intoxicated.
363. ARE YOU AFRAID OF CLOWNS: Terrified.
364. DO YOU LIKE SPIDERS: No. But I'm not scared of them.
365. HOW ABOUT GRAPE KOOL-AID: Sick. I hate purple flavored things.
366. CAN YOU DRIVE: Yes.
367. ARE YOU SPOILED: I WISH.
368. ARE YOU ANTI-SOCIAL: Sometimes.
369. DO YOU SEE DUMB PEOPLE: Yes.
370. DO YOU SEE DEAD PEOPLE: That would be sweet.
371. ANY LAST WORDS: Nope.
372. NOW THAT THIS IS OVER, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO: Go eat my tacos.
373. WHAT TIME IS IT?: 6:18pm

family ties

My sister in law, Candace called me today. I haven't seen/talked to her in about a month, since the last time I watched Maddux. 

Here's a picture for reference of my disgustingly adorable nephew:

We needed to discuss the agenda as far as Sunday goes. Apparently we're kicking things off at about 7:30 or 8am at Mia & Nick's house for breakfast and drinks. Then we will make our way to the parade, and then probably over to my cousin Jack's apartment, where I will most like end up wandering away from, drunk, looking for people I know along Western Ave. 

She also told me I should get dropped off at whatever time I get home from Phron's, so that she can "make sure my ass wakes up". That's family right there - she knows what it's like to wake me up in the mornings, or the fact that I'm completely incapable of waking myself up in the mornings... 

But aside from that, we caught up on the gossip of each other's lives. Nothing too juicy, but satisfying to say the least. Of course I will probably have nothing on my agenda this evening, so I might give her and my brother, Tony, a call back to see if they would like to come over for awhile this evening (and possibly the baby, too, I guess).

My aunt also sent me a message asking me if I could dog sit next week. This excites me because it means $100 to add to the $14 I have to my name at the moment, as well as use of a vehicle for the week. 

But on that note, I've been in my pajamas all day, and I should probably shower.. or something along those lines. 

Except an obnoxiously long survey sometime within the near future as well. I found an epic one in my old LJ re-reads.

-j.

is it just me or...

I'm pretty sure every member of youtube that leaves comments has to meet a list of criteria before doing so:

1. Lack of correct spelling/typing of simple words:

For example: "hey man hes a frikin kid and to all those ppl who say "get a life" or nerd or like he sux well hes probually better then u and he does have a life unlike u ppl hes a kid wat more of a life could he get other than videogames i was like that and im sure u all were too so stfu if u dont like him"

OR

"yo faggots quit liek sayin dude not even i can do this this kid is fucking 9 dude give himn a break this kid si off the chain this isnt fake you guys are just losers that play all day and liek yeah im hte shit at GH3 haha you guys are all douches this kid is the real delal"

Which brings me to my next point.

2. Almost all comments usually include the words: douche, losers, faggots, gay, homo, suck my balls, or some girl telling some dude how hot he is, or that they're in love with him via watching a youtube video. If you're really lucky, a comment might possibly contain ALL OF THOSE WORDS. I'm sure there is at least one that exists.

3. Obviously, you have to have a low IQ to actually start fights on youtube via comments calling a 9 year old getting 95% accuracy on Dragonforce's "Through the Fire and Flames" on Expert (which is absolutely amazing. I get about halfway through it on hard before I want to smash the guitar and cut my hands off because they hurt so bad) a faker... simply because he's 9. And, the whole "you should get a life" thing - you're starting arguments... ON YOUTUBE. Very mature... and productive I do say so myself. 

4. You have to be ignorant. I think rules #1 & #2 explains this one enough. 

And, if anyone would actually like to watch this video, it's amazing. So there you go.

-j.

Can you be where you want to be?

So, hello and welcome, I suppose. 

I haven't regularly blogged in quite some time. But, I do have enough free time on my hands, seeing as I don't have a job, or go to school. 

But I do have the internet.

And a computer.

So here I am. 

I'm going to apologize now for any boredom I cause you, I'm giving no guarantee that my posts will always be entertaining. I mean sure, there are bound to be some. I guess I generally tend to rant in blogs strictly because my friends, namely Jessica, can probably only handle so much of it.

But what started all this was reading over my application essay to Columbia last night. I haven't read it since I sent it in, and wow. I was actually kind of impressed with myself. I suppose I'm pretty good at writing, when I have to that is. 

And now I'm stuck.

I could talk about what I did with my day, but seeing as I've only been awake for about... 7 hours now, too much hasn't really happened. I've done a lot of laundry. 

I also accomplished finding out who won the season finale of Project Runway, and who made it into the top 12 on American Idol. Very stimulating, let me tell you. Ryan Seacrest really threw me for a loop when he just kicked Katy (Kady? Malloy? Molloy?) off almost immediately. I'm not saying I DISAGREE with the decision at all (I mean, she like, really fucking sucked), but just, come on, man. The results episodes are always the best ones to make you angry enough to throw your remote at the television from hearing "....after this break" and the idol theme music 12 hundred times within an hour.  And that's not an exaggeration... at all...

But enough Idol talk. It's bad enough I watch the show as it is. I don't want to be one of those people, and just blog about the tv I watch because it's so much more exciting than their real lives. 

Anyway...

I'm pretty stoked about this weekend. Saturday is Nicki & Ron's birthday celebration. Last year... was a bit rough on me. I blacked out of the first time ever, sooo I had to be recapped about... maybe 70% of the night. Apparently got made-out with. I also told everyone things that probably didn't need to be talked about. It was an interesting night to say the least.

Hopefully this year will go well. I hope Nicki is up for it in general. 

Then Sunday is the parade. I'll let you know how that day pans out as well............

Nothing like getting shitfaced with your family, right?

I'm frustrated. I have a couple pet peeves, but nothing major.

My top two are probably: 

1. Waiting - I hate nothing more than sitting around waiting.

2. Not calling when you say you're going to call - This kind of ties into the first one, as do most of the things that piss me off. But it's like, come on, seriously. Just don't tell me you're going to call me, and we won't have a problem. Because then otherwise I get all excited about it, and then let down. I understand people forget. I forget things all the time. It's just... annoying is all. 

Now I'm getting ranty. I'm going to steer clear of this, and say so long for now. 

-j.